The Importance of Being Earnest

by Oscar Wilde (1899)

Act 1

Lady Bracknell - Female, Over 50 yrs

Scene partner - Jack

Monologue - Comedic, 1:00 to 2:00 min

Lady Bracknell:

Mr. Worthing, I confess I feel somewhat bewildered by what you have just told me. To be born, or at any rate bred, in a hand-bag, whether it had handles or not, seems to me to display a contempt for the ordinary decencies of family life that reminds one of the worst excesses of the French Revolution. And I presume you know what that unfortunate movement led to? As for the particular locality in which the hand-bag was found, a cloak-room at a railway station might serve to conceal a social indiscretion — has probably, indeed, been used for that purpose before now — but it could hardly be regarded as an assured basis for a recognised position in good society.

[Jack: May I ask you then what you would advise me to do? I need hardly say I would do anything in the world to ensure Gwendolens' happiness.]

I would strongly advise you, Mr. Worthing, to try and acquire some relations as soon as possible, and to make a definite effort to produce at any rate one parent, of either sex, before the season is quite over.

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